Not Capable

Another usual Monday morning for me. I got up from my bed and went towards my balcony. The cold windy air greeting me as I sat down at the chair on my left. It's my usual routine before getting ready for school. It's like, I need to have some peace to think before entering the chaotic world or school as they address it.

Right now, i am thinking about what my schoolmate told me before I went home.

"I like you for months now," I recalled him saying that to me. "And I want to ask you out if that is okay."

I ignored him. Acting as if I didn't hear him and walked away.

You guys are probably throwing curses at me for not answering but you need to here me out.

Well, for starters, I am not rude. I am just afraid of what'll happen if I did agreed on going on a date with him. I saw my friends crying and changing because of that. And I don't want that to happen to myself since I am not capable of handling crying nights because of a guy. I am not capable of acting like nothing bad happened to me. I'm certainly not capable handling myself if I change. I don't want to change, ever. Especially not because of a guy.

.....But most of all, I'm not competent when it's about LOVE.