Just a little Bit less...

Every time I hurt you in script
It makes me hurt less
When forever was once each moment in your presence
Now shattered fragments that slit bone into a fractured splinter of segments
As kite strings coax my words to catch wind
And take away this sting of pressure
from an under bandaged blood-let wound
Resistance is renewal
Futile is foreign speech
In a language indistinguishable from that which is born in defeat
And dead on a needle
My lips can only speak your poison from experience with venoms kiss
That's why I considered you the generis of venomous
The most dangerous error I ever shared a bed with
I slept in slithering sheets nested in the pit of your skinned peach
Just an egg that had been de-seeded and needed to hatch repeatedly just to keep the cracks from healing
And feeling the, easy like a Sunday morning, sunny side up vibe was contrite and nill
All I felt was white knuckle fear aggravating the not very subtle fight in your will
I was the shell
And you my filling
But you slipped on the pills and over spilled out a mess
and left me to clean up the sloppy seconds of your illness
Like a messenger boy without a paycheck because I never got the message
Sure, you were embellished in active glitter and gold leaf
With a head of webbed hair that could have spun a thief in a dead stare
A medusa interwoven with arachnid features
And the creature to match
She had the swagger of a beast and all the traction in beauty that sank barely shallow of skin deep
From back roads back seat action
To comatose after the peak of satisfaction
My internal reaction at the time was to be willing prey
Play on the act until the belly of baggage was full
and She had cooled down safely
An unprovoked rage could trigger the victim in me
Called it contagious when she hit me like a disease
And spread to my family and friends I abandoned
This sickness that wore a skin disguise and smiled as commanded
Your phantom still lives
in the exposed brick
midnight sky tiled kitchen
one bedroom apartment quad duplex
on Dennison ave in Victorian village
That I left you in
A premeditated afternoon in autumn
That had been pushed back for several days
The streets were calm
Unlike your normal demeanor
But the shake in my palms could have embalmed an Alzheimer's patient in symptoms of withdrawal
Luckily you never got to see it
Because I was far gone, fleeing
Treating you to the empty feelings that you gave me liberty to be promiscuous with at my leisure
While you stood in the crude oil pool of the place
that once fueled the engine of our relationship
Now just a graveyard of my misplaced youth that was rooted in search and seizure
To once please her
Just a dream within the dream I'm dreaming
Please believe this is my healing
For when I wake tomorrow and reread this
I'll know I get to feel this hurt
For now
Just a little
Bit
Less