The Monster In Me

It's hard to prove your worth
If others only saw you demon of sorts
Tired of fighting every struggling evil you've restrained
If every damning second they have your patience drained.

They, oh so holy, holy spitting image of perfect hypocrites
That when facing you they smiled and offered comfort and stay low on fight
But the moment your back was turned, they talk of you filled with spite
With contempt, with moral-crashing criticism much to their delight.

So now you knew the lie of a life I have to live
Criticised, judged, scorned and mocked and made every living believed
That I was worthless piece of shit and deserrved nothing more
But little privacy, and respect to my soul no more.

So I become the monster they so eagerly painted
A low bitch whose heart is very much tainted
With selfishness, hate and indecent mind
And to the call of good things and conscience I would rather be blind.

For this world, this land does not deserve my honesty
I would rather be evil and forget modesty
For this is how they see me
So this is what I make me.

So judge me, but if you were in my shoes
What would you do, how would you live
In this f----- life where good always lose
And no matter what you do, they take and you give.

So would you rather hate me for being this f-----d up way
Or befriend this lost soul who have gone astray
But I am telling you who so joyfully put me in shame
I still have pride and dignity left in my name....