The One After Him

Part I:

There it is again. Another reminder that he broke your heart; your world. Your voice in shame and wary. The knife of betrayal sprouts from your spine, puncturing your heart from behind, but a look of loss emits from your eyes. I caught the words, "Stop giving him the sweet residency of your beautiful mind. He doesn't deserve it; he desecrated it," before they rolled off my tongue. My place to say that is nonexistent.

Please... Stop loving him, he doesn't need it anymore; he chose to stop loving you. I am happy because I have you and no longer harbor love or ill-willed hatred, for I have forgave and forgotten all my sorrows... Because you deserve all of my essence. Even writing this, my heart pounds heavily in fear that you would not understand why I feel this way. I am not mad, but jealous that he still lingers in your thoughts as I do not. And now, it feels as if a ghostly hand grips my heart and tightens its grasp.

Part II:

Almost like an affair, it feels. I've always been the guy after "HIM" in relationships, and quite frankly I'm exhausted of it. Especially to the one whom I love dearest. I never got to HIS privilege level, because it was a reserved plateau for only HIM--forever held open. I will never be better than HIM, it feels like; I'll never replace HIM; I'll never "be" HIM. Indeed. I could never be a betraying, lying, cheating, excuse of a human man.

Either they went back to HIM after me, or found THE ONE. Always in love, but never loved. He dances with you in your dreams, while I hold your hand in slumber. You're afraid to make new memories with me, either because you don't want to be hurt again and be left with painful love...or because you don't want to replace the ones you already have.