Let me tell you a secret: I never had a secret. You may think that everyone has a secret. Yes, you are right. Everyone has at least one secret; but not me. I hate secrets. They are like bombs that you carry every time everywhere. If you have one, expect it to explode anytime. And the worst thing about the explosion is you are hurting everyone around you and ultimately, yourself.
The name my parents agreed to give me was Clare.
My name is Clare Gloria. And I hereby declare that I almost had a secret when I was five. Year 2004 was the saddest year. Both my parents were teachers at that time. My parents decided to enroll me at a different school, to avoid flying gossips around the school if one of my parents gave me a high grade. Everyone at my elementary school knew that I would never have a high grade because of being a slow-learner. I was not a slow learner; in fact, I was a prodigious daughter. But only my parents knew that. I had low grades because I did not like studying in advance. All I wanted was to watch 'Little Stars Garden', a kid show, where Allan Diaz was always playing a lost pirate.
It was June 20, three days before my birthday; my parents noticed I had a crush on this eight-year-old cute little man, so they decided to make a surprise on my big day.
“A room full of Allan Diaz’s posters?” said Mother. She thought I was already sleeping. “She’s very young for that.”
“Why not? You also had a very big crush on me back in the days,” said Father while closing my room’s door. “But you only had one photo of me you stolen from our elementary graduation book.”
The rest of their flashback conversation was finished in their big room. I hoped they also talked about inviting Allan to my birthday.
The next day was a mess in my head. It was a hot and quiet Saturday. Mother went to Downtown to buy food and balloons. She said she would be back after she visits Rookie’s Birthday Service. Father said he would invite all his friends and some of his rich enemies. Before leaving the house, he said I should stay at home and wait for my mother to come back.
That morning was boring, ‘Little Stars Garden’ would begin at eleven, I had to wait two long hours, and so I secretly followed Father, who was walking down to the public beach near my school.
Until this day, I still blame my feet for following Father that day. I saw him enter a small cottage, located on the most left of the beach. Inside was a pregnant woman. And Father kissed her!
I ran home and stayed at my room. I could hear the opening credits of ‘Little Stars Garden’ from the living room. I could hear Allan shouting his famous line: ‘I will get you, no matter what.’ I wished he got out of the TV and took me away from this house.
Drowning my face into the pillows, I promised not to tell my mother what I saw earlier. I promised this was my first and last secret to save my family.
The promise was broken. My sixth birthday was never celebrated. On my birthday, my parents threatened each other while I was sitting in the living room, hearing their fight. The only thing that lessened my sadness was watching Allan Diaz on TV kidnapping many children. I wished he kidnapped me into his pirate ship that day.
To be continued…